It will not surprise you to learn that I am dull, but it may surprise you to hear that I have only just realised quite how dull I am. I came to this conclusion while considering Lent, and what I could give up for it this year, which led me to realise that I do not do very much that is not essential to existence.
I don't watch TV, smoke or drink immoderate ammounts of alcohol. I don't even really eat chocolate. I do not buy unneccessary amounts of stuff, and I rarely go out for coffee. So I cannot give these up for Lent, because that would be pointless.
There are a number of suggestions in the media, but none of these have helped.
For instance, many people seem to be giving up the Internet for Lent this year. Now I object to this because my work involves the Internet, and therefore I cannot give up the Internet. There appears to be a craze for giving up Facebook, but essentially Facebook is my social life. I could give up my mobile, but I'd be unlikely to notice, which rather defeats the point of giving it up.
Last year, you will remember, I did the Carbon Fast, but it's not that easily repeatable (I cannot get more cavity wall insulation than I already have, for instance (well, unless I build new walls, I suppose, but that would be silly); likewise, there are only so many times you can turn the central heating down by 1 degree before it just gets... well, cold.).
Now please understand that it's not that I think I have to give something up for Lent, or that I get bonus points for doing so, which will stand me in good stead when I try to get into Heaven, for we can readily see that this would fundamentally undermine the doctrines of Justification by Faith, Salvation by Grace Alone and Chocolate Being Not That Bad Really; it's more the principle that it would be nice to have the choice.
In short, what I'm saying is that I need a vice, and all suggestions are welcome.