Friday 1 May 2009

More From The Apprentice

I am now officially addicted to The Apprentice, and am delighted to report that this week's offering served up some gems. Notably, we were introduced to an entirely new collection of strange wannabes. Not, of course, the contestants themselves (who we have already met), but an apparently random selection of The Great British Public.

These included a fishmonger who was prepared to pay £15 for a bucket of half-defrosted jellied eels. Seen from the point of view of the contestants, this is (at first glance anyhow) fairly reasonable - they have jellied eels, he has a fish shop, they make a transaction. But from the point of view of the fishmonger, he's in his shop, and these 3 strangers in suits come in with a load of jellied eels that they want to sell to him. I mean, is that not just a teensy bit odd? Would you not want to know a bit more about where those jellied eels came from? Is this even legal?

But then, you see, there's a tv camera behind them, and perhaps he realises that paying £15 and whatever it costs to dispose of a bucketload of jellied eels is worth his 5 minutes of fame. Unfortunately, he had to share those 5 minutes with 3 obnoxious idiots (well, 2 obnoxious idiots and Nooral; the boy may be an idiot, but he's quite nice) and a fly which could be clearly seen on the fish, but still.

The next glory-snatcher was the bloke who bought the rug from Philip. Again, at first glance, he's a chap who wants a rug, who meets a bloke who has a rug, and he buys the rug. But again, let's turn this round. You're walking along the street, and a bloke with a TV camera, a couple of grinning girls and appalled-looking Margaret behind him offers to sell you the rug he has over his shoulder. You've been vaguely thinking you'd like a rug to cover that burnt patch where you knocked the ash tray off the sofa during the Royle Family Christmas Special, but you'd been thinking of something more... well, blue. Fortunately the bloke only wants £50 for it, and promises you that you can imagine it's blue, and !PLING! you instantly want it. Without even seeing it. You don't even know it doesn't have burn marks on it. But you pay 50 quid for it regardless.

Essentially I can see 2 possibilities: either these people are desperate for fame but too uninteresting even for Big Brother, or the whole thing is a big set-up. The latter case is not an option which I like, so it must be the first.

I also have 2 more things to say about The Apprentice; both concern Debra.

1. That's not how you spell 'Deborah'.

2. She looks like someone, but I can't think who. Someone in something I read pointed out that she looks like her face was drawn by a small child, which is true, but is not what I was thinking of. After a great deal of consideration, I have concluded that she looks like someone from Guess Who?, but I can't find any pictures from it in order to advance this theory. Can anyone help?

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