Wednesday 11 September 2013

In which we see that Mr Smile is fighting a losing battle

So Mr Smile just showed me this thing that one of his friends had shared on Facebook. Now, for a kick-off, it was from a page called "The Romantic Box", which should have given him adequate warning that this wasn't something I was going to fall for, but against his better judgement, he showed it to me anyway.

I can't find it to share it here, but basically it was a photo of a dress, on a bed, with a label attached saying something like "Dinner at 7. Put this on. Be ready at 6.30. I love you." So I stared at for a good 30 seconds, and then I was all like "I don't get it".

So Mr Smile explained that this guy had bought the dress for his wife, and was telling her to wear it when they went to dinner.

Apparently this is the most romantic thing ever, according to Mr Smile, and I was all like "Never ever do this". Apart from the fact that I don't eat out, there are several problems: what if the dress doesn't fit? What if the colour doesn't suit me? What if I don't have shoes or a bag to go with it? What if I already have plans for 6.30? What if I only get home at 6.25 and I haven't shaved my legs and stuff? What if I got peckish in work at 5 and scoffed 8 bars of Dairy Milk and now I'm not that hungry?

But Mr Smile won't believe me that this is the worst idea ever, although I have warned him that if he ever takes it into his head to buy me a dress and take me out for dinner, I'd really more appreciate it if he just gave me the cash.

So we're putting it out to a vote: is this the best or the worst idea in the world ever?

5 comments:

Unknown said...

Yes it is

Because

He knows what suits you
He knows your size
He knows you can accessorise
He knows you are free
He knows you won't eat 8 bars of chocolate at 5 o'clock
He knows he loves you and he knows you love him too.

Also, he clearly wants to spend his money on you AND he can go shopping!!! Result!

But it does all depend on the dress!

ScatterCode said...

If he knows me at all, he knows there's every chance I'll eat 8 Dairy Milks at 5pm.

I suppose it would save me going clothes shopping though.

Unknown said...

Assuming he'd got all the above right, size, color, style and she loved the dress then maybe it's nice but I don't even trust myself to buy a dress I like so the thought of someone else doing it makes me sweat. Your other points are frankly irrefutable. I load up on yellow snack bars frequently. on the other hand I am always hungry. Perhaps if he miraculously found a dress I liked (and I miraculously didn't doubt that I looked like an idiot in it) and he left it on the bed sometime in the early afternoon I could see it as romantic but deep down all I really want to say is "don't bloody tell me what to wear, and don't you like my other dresses?" Yes I have too many insecurities to find this romantic. Sorry Mr smile, but I do like your desire to be romantic to Mrs smile and she will let you win sometimes I'm sure.

Unknown said...

Bad. Idea.

ScatterCode said...

After reflecting, I think my primary objections are:

1. The assumption that I have no other plans and am in the mood to go out for dinner. I appreciate that this is mainly an issue because I hate spontaneity anyway, and I'm a moody cow.

2. The objectification of buying me a skimpy dress and acting like it's a present for me. If it was a nice jumper or something generally less revealing, I might feel differently. Of, as some people have said, if it was a dress I had previously admired.