Now, if there are 2 things we all know about WhyNotSmile, they are surely these:
1. WhyNotSmile is strongly against running, particularly in public, and under any circumstances other than when being chased by a dragon or trying to catch a bus. Let me be clear: it is not merely that I don't like running (in the same way in which I have no especial affinity for bus tours of Canberra or tickling otters, but might well be Happy Enough with them if circumstances allowed); it is more of an actual, active dislike (similar to my feelings on having my eyes gouged out with red hot pokers).
2. WhyNotSmile does not ever get asked out on dates by anyone, ever.
So it was something of a surprise to find myself, not one month ago, in a sports shop, looking for running shoes with my boyfriend. And not just running shoes for him (although also that), but running shoes for me, because I have taken up running.
Naturally, there is a reason for this, and it should not be considered a permanent thing.
It has been agreed that we'll enter some teams in the marathon relay this year, from church, as a fundraising effort. So Boyfriend Smile and I are on one of the teams, and I've been practicing.
I have adopted a "slow but steady" approach. The first month consisted almost entirely of eating chocolate while researching trainers online, because it is Important to have Energy Reserves before you run (no sense trying to catch up afterwards). Now we're into the second month, and I've actually started going out onto the streets and running a bit (I disapprove of going to gyms, because then you're paying money to do something you could do for free anywhere at all; I also disapprove of running in the rain/cold/drizzle/any form of discomfort).
Happily, I managed to get bargain trainers, reduced from £60 to £20, and wearing them is a little bit like running on clouds. I cut quite the figure jogging around East Belfast, I must say.
Anyhow, the point is that I expect you all to sponsor me, and I shall set up a Page of some kind so that you are able to do this online at your own convenience. Because I'm all about the being nice to you.