I have finally finished Catch-22, having speed-read the final hundred pages or so, and now I feel like my life can get back on track.
Anyway, I got caught up in a discussion over on ShipOfFools.com about books you never managed to finish. Now, technically, I will never admit to myself that I have given up on a book; I just 'postpone it for later' and hope one of us dies or gets eaten by worms before the charity shops run out of alternative reading material. So this (in no particular order) is the current list of 'postponed' books:
1. 'To The Lighthouse' by Virginia Wolff. After reading 5 pages and realising it was all one sentence, gave up in a huff. Learn to use full stops, woman.
2. 'Captain Correlli's Mandolin' by Louis De Bernieres. 4 chapters, 4 different sets of characters and 4 different plots. Tie it together, captain.
3. 'The Confessions of Saint Augustine'. You may recall me buying this in a frenzy of shopping just over a year ago. Maybe my problem was context: maybe this is not the book for a sunny afternoon in the back garden, sipping cool drinks and eating ice cream.
4. 'Amy Carmichael of Donhaver'. A Sunday School prize when I was about 14. Meant to be an inspiring story about a missionary from Millisle; just couldn't get into how nice she was. Maybe if I read it now I'd be a more appreciative audience. Gave it away to a charity shop though.
And the ones I hated but finished anyway:
1. 'True History of the Kelly Gang' by Peter Carey. Very well-written, but I hated the characters and was glad when they died.
2. 'Catch-22' by Joseph Heller. As previously discussed. Again, not a bad book, just not for me.
3. 'The Purpose-Driven Life' by Rick Warren. Apologies to those who loved it and thought it was better than the Bible.
4. 'The Da Vinci Code' by Dan Brown. Just poor - not even interestingly bad, just dull.
5. Anything by Janette Oke. These would warrant a blog entry of their own. The typical American Mid-west Christian novel, where the bad guys get saved or get their comeuppance, and the good guys get married and have beautiful babies. Bleurgh.
Discuss.
Sunday, 12 October 2008
Saturday, 11 October 2008
Sound Investment Advice
Came across this and thought it was worth a mention:
If you had purchased £1000 of Northern Rock shares one year ago it would now be worth £4.95.
With HBOS, earlier this week your £1000 would have been worth £16.50.
£1000 invested in XL Leisure would now be worth less than £5.
But if you bought £1000 worth of Tennants Lager one year ago, drank it all, then took the empty cans to an aluminum re-cycling plant, you would get £214.
Tuesday, 7 October 2008
On The Theological Background and Socio-Economic Implications of the Current Global Financial Crisis
Not really. Because WhyNotSmile barely knows how a bank account works, and would never have even a faint glimmer of interest in worldwide financial markets. Especially when the people have spoken and have voted by an overwhelming majority of 2 to 0 to hear about The Largest Bar of Soap in the World.
Here is a photo of the largest bar of soap in the world:
The first question you always get asked when you own the Largest Bar of Soap in the World, is 'How did you come by such a large bar of soap?'
Well, it was a present. From my aunt, uncle and cousins, for my 30th birthday. It came in a little case with various other bits and pieces - hand cream, lip balm and so on - all of which were on the generous side of averagely proportioned, but not of a size which was worthy of note. The soap was wrapped in paper, and without looking, I thought 'oh, some bars of soap, that's nice', and put them aside for when I needed them.
It wasn't until a couple of weeks ago when I unwrapped the soap package that I discovered that it was not, in fact, 5 bars of soap, but 1 giant bar of soap.
So this is how I came by the Largest Bar of Soap in the World.
The next questions people often ask is "Just how big is this giant bar of soap?"
Quite big. You can see in the picture above that it is higher than the taps. I measured it from end to end (over the top), and it is 15.4 cm in soapcumference.
Here it is in my hand:
It is, in fact, too big to pick up and wash your hands with, so you have to sort of wet your hands and then fondle it.
So this is the Largest Bar of Soap in the World. I will of course monitor its progress and let you know how it gets on.
Here is a photo of the largest bar of soap in the world:
The first question you always get asked when you own the Largest Bar of Soap in the World, is 'How did you come by such a large bar of soap?'
Well, it was a present. From my aunt, uncle and cousins, for my 30th birthday. It came in a little case with various other bits and pieces - hand cream, lip balm and so on - all of which were on the generous side of averagely proportioned, but not of a size which was worthy of note. The soap was wrapped in paper, and without looking, I thought 'oh, some bars of soap, that's nice', and put them aside for when I needed them.
It wasn't until a couple of weeks ago when I unwrapped the soap package that I discovered that it was not, in fact, 5 bars of soap, but 1 giant bar of soap.
So this is how I came by the Largest Bar of Soap in the World.
The next questions people often ask is "Just how big is this giant bar of soap?"
Quite big. You can see in the picture above that it is higher than the taps. I measured it from end to end (over the top), and it is 15.4 cm in soapcumference.
Here it is in my hand:
It is, in fact, too big to pick up and wash your hands with, so you have to sort of wet your hands and then fondle it.
So this is the Largest Bar of Soap in the World. I will of course monitor its progress and let you know how it gets on.
Saturday, 4 October 2008
On Facebook and Democracy
Two things:
1. You can now be a fan of WhyNotSmile on Facebook. You do this, I think, by scrolling down this page to the little box in the left-hand column which looks like a Facebook-style box. Don't really know what you do after that, but I'm sure if you click it, it will tell you.
2. I currently own the Largest Bar of Soap in the World. I've been having an internal debate about whether this is interesting enough to warrant a blog entry or two, and have decided to throw it out to a democratic decision. Would you like to hear about the Largest Bar of Soap in the World? Please leave comments below.
That's all for now.
1. You can now be a fan of WhyNotSmile on Facebook. You do this, I think, by scrolling down this page to the little box in the left-hand column which looks like a Facebook-style box. Don't really know what you do after that, but I'm sure if you click it, it will tell you.
2. I currently own the Largest Bar of Soap in the World. I've been having an internal debate about whether this is interesting enough to warrant a blog entry or two, and have decided to throw it out to a democratic decision. Would you like to hear about the Largest Bar of Soap in the World? Please leave comments below.
That's all for now.
Friday, 3 October 2008
The Catch
We all know by now that when there is a list that could in any way conceivably be construed as a 'Things You Must Do' list, WhyNotSmile is as unable to resist as a QuestionMonkey in a theology debate. It is for this reason that I am currently reading my way through the following:
The problem is, we've hit a snag: a fairly big, 500+ pages snag, in the form of Catch-22. I just can't get through it. It's not that it's dull exactly - in fact, it's very funny - more that it's a bit wearing after a while. There seems to be nothing much in the way of a storyline; the characters appear to exist simply to convey jokes. Much like WhyNotSmile, you might say.
At the moment I'm about half-way through, and determined not to give up, even though this is the first time in history that I've had to renew a library book because it took me longer than the allotted time to read it.
If anyone has read this book, can you please reassure me that I'll make it to the end? I mean, it's number 11 on the BBC Big Read list, so there must be lots of people out there who've read it and enjoyed it. Please tell me what I'm missing.
- The Booker Prize winning books, since the dawn of time (read 15 out of 41)
- The Guardian Top 100 Books of all time (read 53 out of 100)
- The BBC Big Read Top 100 Books of all time (read 49 out of 100)
The problem is, we've hit a snag: a fairly big, 500+ pages snag, in the form of Catch-22. I just can't get through it. It's not that it's dull exactly - in fact, it's very funny - more that it's a bit wearing after a while. There seems to be nothing much in the way of a storyline; the characters appear to exist simply to convey jokes. Much like WhyNotSmile, you might say.
At the moment I'm about half-way through, and determined not to give up, even though this is the first time in history that I've had to renew a library book because it took me longer than the allotted time to read it.
If anyone has read this book, can you please reassure me that I'll make it to the end? I mean, it's number 11 on the BBC Big Read list, so there must be lots of people out there who've read it and enjoyed it. Please tell me what I'm missing.
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